How To Control Frames and Meta-Frames
For a proper attitude in dealing with women it’s very important to understand the concept of frames.
A “frame” is a general focus or direction that provides an overall guide for thoughts and actions during an interaction. A frame determines the underlying meaning of behaviors and actions. A “meta-frame” is an overall focus or direction that provides a meaning to the interaction. A more general term for frames and meta-frames is the social dynamics.
Frames don’t exist in objective reality. They’re not “real”. They only exist inside the skulls of human beings. But they’re extremely important in dealing with people.
Generally, when two people’s meta-frames are in conflict, the stronger/more assertive metaframe is dominant.
A woman may or may not buy into your meta-frame. But even if she doesn’t, you’re conveying that you’re unwilling to buy into hers.
How to control the Meta-Frame:
Step 1: Define the meta-frame: If you don’t set it, the woman will define it for you, and assert hers.
Here’s a way to properly define the underlying meaning of the interaction:
1. You are the PRIZE.
2. She’s trying to get you to like her or trying to win you over whether it be in the sense of attraction, acceptance, or validation.
3. She wants you so bad that she’s trying to make you sleep with her.
4. The both of you are going to sleep together, but only if she lives up to your standards and expectations.
Step 2: Assume the meta-frame in advance
Assume before even talking to her that the underlying meaning of all her behaviors and actions when you do talk to her will fit into your meta-frame.
Step 3: Set frames that imply the meta-frame. Some ways to do this:
1. Frame one or more of her actions, behaviors, or things about her as meaning that she’s not good enough for you or can’t handle you (implies you’re the prize).
2. Frame one or more of her actions as her being interested or trying to pursue you.
3. Frame one or more of her behaviors or actions as her being a little crazy (refuse to buy into it).
4. Frame one or more of her behaviors, actions, or something about her as meaning that she lacks class.
5. Frame one or more of her behaviors, actions, or something about her as meaning that she’s a dork.
6. Accuse her of not really living the life that she wants to live, or accuse her of being envious of you.
7. Frame one or more of her behaviors, actions, or something about her as meaning that she’s a little creepy.
8. Frame some of her behaviors, actions, or things about her as meaning that she’s a sleaze ball.
9. Frame some of her behaviors and actions as being rude and insensitive
Notice that many of these frames are the frames that women set with guys. So, you’re taking the frames they use to turn guys into frustrated, pathetic beggars, and using them against them.
Attempt at all times to do this in a humorous way. When women are laughing, their guard is down and they’re more apt to go along with the frames you’re setting.
And Let Us Also Learn How To Your Physical and Emotional State
you are the only one responsible for how you feel. Other people don’t make us feel anything. It’s our own interpretations of their words and behavior that affect us.
Controlling how you feel is crucial. It’s up to you to remain emotionally calm. Women count on us for this, and thank us for it when they go nutty. It’s the man’s responsibility to be in control of his emotions. Women are not attracted to weepy little wimps. I’m not saying you can’t show emotion, but don’t be provoked to feel an emotion by another person that you don’t choose to have. Every woman out there has her own insecurities and fears. Remember that you have the advantage of strategies and logic on your side, and all you need to do is control!
You are going to have to stop getting emotional when women try to make you angry, sad, or upset. These are all tests by women, and you will fall right into the trap by getting all worked up. You are going to have to stop falling for all their games, dramatic behavior, and attempts to control you through your fear of losing them. Women desire a man who is beyond their control, beyond their attempts to make him do anything, or to make him upset. The message is if you put up with her crap, how can you protect her? A dominant man allows a woman to feel safe and protected.
So how do you control your state? How do you stay calm when a woman is yelling at you for stupid shit, or when she just dissed you in front of the entire party?
Positively interpreting things is one way. At some point in your life you’ve probably been in a situation where something embarrassing or negative happened to you, and someone said “One day you’ll look back on this and laugh.” And you probably did! Well when you find yourself in a shitty situation today, why not laugh at it today? Why wait for someday? Also, think of how terrible something may have seemed when it happened to you years ago, and how it means nothing to you now. When something negative happens to you today, why not have it mean nothing to you today as well? This can be done through positive interpretation, a re-framing of the “negative” situation.
Here’s another method for controlling your state:
Your physical and emotional states are closely tied together. For example, when someone is depressed, what do they look like physically? Often they’re slumped over with poor posture, taking short steps, their head’s down, and they have a sad look on their face. And when someone’s happy or excited they bounce around and they’re more animated.
The fact that there’s a link between the physical and the emotional is good news for controlling our state. When you find yourself slouched over and unfocused, you can sit up straight with good posture and breathe deeply, and you’ll find yourself more alert and able to concentrate. When you find yourself worried about something, you can stand tall, look up at the ceiling, smile a big smile, and hold it (in fact, it’s hard to stay in any negative state in this position). You can breathe deeply and slowly to reduce anxiety and fear. And when a woman is going crazy and giving you problems, you can take a deep breath, smile and narrow your eyes at her, and slowly cross your arms.