How To Pick Up Women In Clubs And Bars With 10 PM Rule
I have this great approach called “The 10 p.m. Rule.” The biggest mistake men make on a Friday night is… going out on a Friday night. Most men tend to gear up for a Friday night that never ever takes off. How many times have you been out on a Friday night when the only thing in your hand at the end of the evening is a bill and an empty bottle of beer?
Women on the other hand, go out on a Friday night to catch up with their friends. Now, granted, for single women if they meet somebody, that is a huge bonus. But most of the time, they’re going out to bond with their friends.
Men head out on a Friday night with a hunters mentality. They go out with the sole purpose of meeting women, and their energy turns very desperate and pack-like. You know exactly what I’m talking about. We’ve talked about it already and you’ve seen it before a group of guys standing around, not talking to each other, and just checking out every woman who moves in the bar.
So what can you do to assure your success meeting women on a Friday night? This is where my “10 p.m. Rule” comes into play.
Depending on the place, many women after 10 p.m. are starting to get annoyed. They’re annoyed because they’ve been fending off the drunk guys. The later the night gets, the more annoyed a woman becomes about her decision to go out that night.
Go into any bar or restaurant in the world and take a look at a woman’s energy at 8:00 p.m. … at 9:00 p.m. … at 10:00 p.m. … at 11:00 p.m and at midnight. As each hour progresses on a Friday night, she’s had to ward off another drunken, annoying guy who said the same thing as each of the other guys who approached before him.
What most men do wrong, is to wait until they get some “liquid courage” and find the right drunken moment to approach a woman. A woman has been standing around fending off men all night long. By the time he approaches, no matter how clever he thinks his approach is, she’s already heard it, and is turned off before he’s even done.
This is why the “10 p.m. Rule” works every time, because you won’t be just like those other guys. When women go out on a Friday, they tend to be out early, and they tend to be with only one or two friends before they meet “the pack.”
Sometimes early in the evening, they’re even out alone at a bar or a restaurant waiting for a friend. At this point, they’re also very open to what the night might have in store for them, because they have yet to deal with the annoying drunken guy.
The power of the “10 p.m. Rule” is that you’re going to talk to them when they are most open, plus you’ll be the guy she compares against all the drunken idiots she has to fend off that night.
So here’s the rule – you’re going to engage her well before 10 p.m.
By getting to her before the parade of annoying drunken men begins, you will become more attractive and intriguing to her as the night progresses (without you even being there)!
She will be intrigued by you, because you are the complete opposite of all the guys who are approaching her with the same lines, the same level of drunkenness, and the same tired game.
When I coach guys, one of my favorite things to do is use the 10 p.m. rule on a Friday night and show him how he is going to meet the most incredible woman before she even starts her evening.
Imagine, it’s 7:00 p.m. on a Friday night and, for the purpose of this story, let’s say there’s a woman named Amy who is out at a local restaurant waiting for her friend to arrive. She’s all excited about it being Friday night. No more work. No more screaming boss. Just a nice night of fun beginning right then. Her energy and her mind are open to anything.
This is the best time to approach Amy. She’s feeling really good about everything and this is the time when most men tend not to approach, because they’re waiting for the alcohol and the evening to kick in first. This is a big mistake and the reason that learning “The 10 p.m. Rule” becomes so invaluable.
So here’s Amy standing at a bar, open and ready to hang out with you. What can you do? You walk directly over to her, and you ask her “Are your friends late too?” By stating the obvious, you will then get her to talk about her friend(s), and you can have a fun conversation based upon both your friends being late. (Remember, you started a conversation based on an observation, in this case she was alone, which could be because her friends are late.
Plus, asking about her friends will give you an exit strategy… which is important. Why? Having an exit strategy is important, because you are acknowledging and respecting the fact that she is going out with friends, which is another thing that guys never do, and which she’ll notice and appreciate.
Let’s say the conversation with Amy is going well, and then her friend shows up. This is when you should close her, immediately.
After quickly introducing yourself to her friend, simply say something like: “Hey… I really enjoyed talking to you Amy. I don’t want to interfere with your time with your friend, so I’ll let you guys catch up. I’m going to call my friend and see where he is, but let’s get together next week and have a drink.”
At this point, you exchange phone numbers, you tell her to have a great night with her friend, and walk away. We’ll talk more about this shortly, but you have now become the confident guy to whom she will compare all the annoying guys who approach her during the remainder of the evening.
You will be the guy she will wish she was talking to instead of all the drunken annoying guys who approach her that night. She will also be really happy that she finally met somebody who was not trying so hard to pick her up!
Now, there’s one final piece to this rule and the reason it’s called the “10 p.m. Rule” and not the “Before 10 p.m. Rule,” even though all the ground work is done before 10 p.m. You ready?
You should text her at 10 p.m.
By this time, she will have been dealing with a few drunken guys who have already annoyed her. So, you want to get back inside her head, make her really jazzed that she met you, and reconfirm the gut instinct she had about you earlier.
The text that I want you to send is very simple:
“It was great meeting you earlier! How’s your night going? 🙂 I’m heading home. Just had dinner with a friend. Let’s talk tomorrow. [Your name]”
By doing this, you’re showing her that you’re not like the rest of the guys who are out getting drunk and trying to hunt for women. From time to time, I’ve had a woman text me back and ask me if I’d like to meet her out that night for a drink.
When you do what other guys don’t do, you become the man whom she desires most – the man who compared so favorably against all those other drunkards she encountered that night. Additionally, you’ll get home early, so you can start the next morning bright and fresh, ready to meet more women.
Here is another thing I used to do in bars on a Friday night. I used to get there early, so I could pick out the women I wanted to talk to. I truly believe first impressions are everything. If you’re the first guy to approach her at night, you’re the most confident guy to do so, and you can give her the best five minutes of who you are.
So I like to get there early, and walk over and be funny. Because like in our example, if a woman is there early, she’s usually waiting for a friend. Or, if she’s sitting with a friend at a bar, one of them is sending a text, because there is always a missing friend. That’s what I love about modern technology and you can use it to your advantage.
I walk over 100% confidently, and I look her directly in the eyes and say “Will you stop texting me? I’m here already.” Then I smile at her. She’s going to start laughing; they always do. This works all the time.
Then you can make a comment and say, “All right, which friend is late? Who is standing you up?” Then she’ll complain about her friend, because usually when a friend is late, it’s not the first time. It’s probably the 100th time. She’ll be able to vent, because she’s already laughed. Plus, you’ve used a little psychological tactic. You made her feel like she’s been texting you, even though she wasn’t. By being funny and saying that, she almost feels like she knows you. “What are you doing right now? I’m here, so stop texting me already. You’re going to break that phone.” So, you’ve established some friendship and familiarity, while being funny, and she’ll remember you for it.