Women Are Gods And Continue Reading To Find The Reason
If you looked at the title you probably got confused at that title didn’t you?
I would too and with good reason.
The reason I decided to name this article Women Are Gods is because that is a reflection on the way most men tend to think about them.
Most men will bend over backwards and put a carjack up there ass wherever a gorgeous woman wants them to and make.
Then, they’ll make her the center of their life even if she doesn’t give a shit.
These are the guys who will spend money on them, be extra careful of their “frail, delicate flower” personalities and constantly shower them with love and attention.
Does any of this sound familiar to you?
“Nobody could love her the way I could.”
“I can’t believe a woman this gorgeous is actually interested in talking to me. I better not screw it up.”
“If she would just turn around and look I could impress her so much!”
“I wouldn’t want to do anything that she might not like.”
“I’m afraid to lose her”
“If she doesn’t feel the same way about me I’ll be so hurt.”
“If I lose here I don’t know what I’ll do.”
Could you pick out the common problem that all these beliefs have?
ALL OF THEM HAND CONTROL TO THE WOMAN ON A SILVER PLATTER THAT THE GUY SPENT FOUR WEEKS MAKING IN A POTTERY CLASS HIS HOT GIRLFRIEND WANTED HIM TO TAKE.
“I Was Being Myself And Look How That Worked Out”
This is one of my favorite mindsets that most men use in so many words as their rationalization for creating a social mask for themselves.
I’m sure you have heard this conversation many times and probably been in a few like this yourself:
Her: You don’t need to be fake just be yourself and women will like you.
Him: (Thinking) Yeah right! I was myself for 12 years and you didn’t pay me any attention then.
Well, I’d like to make a little correction on this logic here.
This man thought he was himself for 25 years when in reality all he was really doing was acting on his social programming.
This idea represents an understanding in which there is a huge falling out between a man’s logic and what is really going on.
So by now you’re probably asking what a person’s real self is.
Let me quickly give you the real self test that will determine whether or not you are truly being your real self.
When you were your “real self” in your younger years did you ever:
Worry about what others thought of you.
Change your behavior because you thought it would make others like you more.
Avoid speaking your mind because you were afraid of what others might think.
Avoid taking a risk because it could potentially bruise your ego and bring about your fear of failure.
Avoid doing something because it wasn’t “politically correct” or “socially acceptable”.
Suspend your wants and needs because you believed it would get you what you want.
Try to supplicate a woman (or a cool guy) in to liking you.
Do whatever you wanted whenever you wanted and made no excuses or apologies for your interests or desires as a man.
Hmm there seems to be a check missing on that list and the most important one at that. Seems like you were being what others wanted you to be and not your real self.
Looks like we’ve got some work to do.
A Teaspoon of Reality
Back when I was “being myself” I tried every trick you could imagine to get women to go out with me or even just talk to me. I got to the point where I even tried doing a girl’s homework for her (Obviously now I fully realize that she knew what she was doing but back then it was a chance to please my dream girl and like a pawn I ran at the opportunity.)
But why would these sweet angels of the earth who always talk about hating jerks or guys who use women ever do something like this?
SHE SEES THINGS AS SHE WANTS THEM TO BE.
What I mean by this is that many attractive women, and people in general, will not hesitate to take advantage of an opportunity for free gifts, food, money, cars, attention or whatever else he can throw at her.
As humans our logic can be easily blinded and overpowered by our emotions.
There are plenty of women (not all) who will view “losers” as “expendable” in a dehumanizing way and see them as benefit for themselves.
Attractive women are used to having the power and control in society and in most of their relationships (platonic or otherwise) with men.
The problem with this is that once you give a woman the general idea that she is in the host’s seat and you are in the hot seat she will lose interest and realize you are…oh how do they put it? Oh yeah:
JUST LIKE ALL THE OTHER GUYS OUT THERE; NO DIFFERENT.
You prevent and counter providing a woman this mindset by remembering one simple phrase:
ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS.
If you were unsuccessful with women chances are you were never being yourself around them.
Don’t worry though, this is a common misconception in the statement “yourself”.
Most guys tend to think of themselves as what they see in the mirror every morning, the face they put on in public, the face they put on at home, ect however there is a fine line between what you are and being yourself.
The reason why most guys never connect these two mentalities is because one primarily exists on a subconscious level and places the body in a certain emotional state for the purpose of achieving a desired outcome or goal.
Women are world class communication experts and they can detect a fake guy a mile away. Many women will not say anything about a guy’s fakeness out of a desire to be polite, spare your feelings or just see how far they can get you to run for them but you can be sure they’ll know.
In fact, most women will not even be aware of their numerous evaluations and assessments they are making on a conscious level. It will simply show up in the way their body make them feel a certain way when they’re around you.
What you are is a result of all your social programming and belief systems you have set up throughout the years. Your real self is who you are underneath all those layers of fake personality. Your real self is not afraid of rejection, not worried about getting a certain outcome, ect.
So if this sounds like you, go out and find the real you and bring him out because he will be effortlessly attractive to women and he will get all the women he desires no matter what shape or size they may come in.
The Approval Junkie
Humans are approval and verification junkies…well most anyway.
I am going to get a little personal here and give you an understanding of why this mindset is so powerful and how big an effect it can have on your life.
I can remember years ago whenever I saw a girl I was attracted to, I would stand around the popular kids. Well, in reality it was more 9th grade 5’3 me standing outside of the popular kids circle trying to look like I was in the group as much as possible even if all their heads were turned away from me.
I acted this way because I didn’t know what I could possibly do that would achieve better results.
This was another one of those counter-intuitive things that I never thought of at the time. I had no concept of “alpha males” or “social status” and its importance as a primary sex characteristic.
So back to my story, I know the girls saw me but I didn’t want to accept that I had to deal with this situation and do more than fumble outside a social circle in order to succeed. At the time, I stood there like a loser knowing what the girls thought but assuming that was the best I could do for myself.
Eventually I began to change and decide that if nothing in my life was going to work, I was just going to say whatever was on my mind and tell others exactly what I was thinking.
My ego was still heavily damaged at the time and it ended up coming out as an incessant need to be right.
In spite of this need to be right, at the time I couldn’t quite put my finger on it but I began to feel like I was putting myself in a better position; a position where I didn’t have to live up to or try to prove myself to anyone; I was finally on the long path to becoming my real self.
I also began to notice that girls began to respond to me differently. Girls who would have played me in the past would try to do it again and I would feel a sense of pride in being able to shoot them down.
I got to the point where I hoped girls would try to play me so I could dominate their reality and let them know I meant business.
The problem at this time was that I still did not know what was really normal… I had no knowledge of the fact that I was acting arrogant, trying to be right, and trying to be better than everyone around me.
But the important step was that I was no longer listening to and conforming to peer pressure and I was no longer a tool.
A problem with this was that after all my years as a pushover, I had built up an enormous degree of faulty beliefs and ideas that came out.
I knew I had to challenge peer pressure but had to take every ounce of strength to do it instead of having it occur effortlessly.
As a few more years passed I began to understand things more and more.
I learned to understand my ego and the importance of freeing myself from need.
When I came out the other side of the tunnel, I was finally the man who didn’t care what anyone else thought. I was no longer a slave to anyone or anything; not even my own emotions.
would go out, take what I wanted, and make no apologies or excuses for my desires as a man.
“Is That Okay With You?”
We are constantly looking for others to compliment us, tell us “good job” and most importantly:
TELL US THAT WHAT WE ARE DOING IS APPROPRIATE AND THAT WE ARE HEADED IN THE “RIGHT” DIRECTION.
I emphasize that so strongly because that mindset has screwed up my life and the lives of a lot of people I know.
Most people do what is “cool” or accepted.
Pop quiz: what is the difference between an iPod and an Mp3 player other than the fact you are required to use iTunes and non-standardized Apple cables with the iPod?
The answer: almost nothing.
Get the point? Even if something is less convenient, more expensive and less universally compatible people will want it because it is the “hot” item.
We follow the culture and follow what others are doing – we want to belong and fit in even if it’s a huge inconvenience to us.
On top of this, most people want to be led rather than be leading.
Most people do not prefer to be in positions of leadership where they have responsibilities and the task of thinking for themselves…
So they just let others do their thinking for them instead.
Hey, why not right?
If you want to get a woman with options however you’re going to need to be willing to lead and be willing to take control.
Women want men who can lead.
I want you to imagine two things:
1) Imagine a guy who sits with a woman and flows the following conversation:
Nick: So where do you want to go?
Tanya: I don’t know, I don’t really have a preference.
Nick: No sweetie I want you to chose.
Tanya: I don’t know uhh…Red Robin?
Nick: Sounds Great. That’s exactly where I would have chosen.
How did that make you feel? Big sexual chemistry huh?
2) Imagine a guy who sits with a woman and flows the following conversation:
Nick: Let’s go out for dinner
(Nick gently grabs Tanya’s hand and she stumbles behind)
Tanya: Where are we going
(Still holding hands with Tanya tagging along behind)
Nick: It’s a surprise
(Tanya follows in anticipation)
Nick: If you stop asking maybe I’ll give you a special surprise when we get there.
Quite a difference in conceptualization there, huh?
What kind of image did you get reading those two; which one felt more “right”?
This all goes back to our desperate need which is conditioned in us from the moment our parents took that ball from us as punishment for not conforming to their standards and we started crying; we started to experience that need for having something back once we lose it.
When you are with a woman you shouldn’t look for her to approve or look for her opinions on:
What you do
What you believe in
How you act
How you feel/think and behave
Anything at all
This extends to her as well and so long as she respects these limits and boundaries with you so too should you with her.
This also falls under the category of being a leader.
A woman doesn’t want a man to pander around, babysit and look pathetic in front of her friends and family.
A woman wants a man who will lead her, protect her and who she can show off to her family.
Although you are the dominant one in the relationship neither one of you owns each other’s reality and you want to make sure that you are respecting both your rights to humanity and hers.
That means she doesn’t step all over you and you don’t step all over her.
If she tries bullshit like throwing a tantrum, stringing you along or whining never be afraid to call her out on it.
The sets the terms that you’re not going to let her bullshit you or let her have the emotional control over you.
WOMEN KNOW WHEN THEY’RE GETTING THE UPPER HAND
Of course they’re not going to walk up to you and say,
“Oh look! I’ve found your weakness and exploit it to get my needs met.”
They’re going to subtly coax you in to giving them what they want until they milk the cow for all it’s worth.
This is one of those many things we know is bad for us that we shouldn’t do that we do anyway because it is too easy with the potential for too much benefit.
The Key To Attraction
“I have never talked to a woman who has been turned on by supplication; it is simply not what they are programmed to be attracted to.”
Unfortunately for the female race this is what most men in the world are conditioned to be (either that or too full of themselves). But on the whole, most guys who get in the presence of an attractive woman tend to act in a way that conveys that they need her.
Why? Because they do need her. They don’t have the emotional maturity not to.
So how do they try to get their needs met? Usually by a mix of sucking up, ass kissing, favor doing and money spending.
Fortunately for you, you have a huge chance to stand out and snag up all of the women that these other guys aren’t going to have the slightest chance with.
I can’t tell you how many times have I have seen a man who couldn’t give a shit about anyone, but the moment he gets a hot woman in his life he is suddenly worrying about every little aspect of his life to make sure she is happy with him.
I can remember a good friend of mine our senior year of high school who suddenly found himself dating the most attractive woman in our class. Any guesses what happened? Me and my other friends slowly witnessed his transition from a cocky, macho, womanizing football star to a high school senior who’s favorite habits became:
“Oh I can’t man I’m spending the weekend with Sara at her parents place.”
Sitting with her and her girlfriends at lunch.
Telling us about how she wouldn’t put out.
Not shutting up about Sara.
Get the point? He went from being the least likely to ever become whipped or tied down to being the most whipped and tied down guy in the school.
Why did this happen? Simple. He was letting his emotions control him and regulate his behavior. The moment he let his need for her outweigh his need for anything else he became her tool and she didn’t hesitate to become aware of this fact.
Can you peek in to your memory and recall some good times like the one I just described?
Ahh, what fond memories of my days as a beta male.
These were the days when I believed that they key to a woman’s “heart” was through good deeds, love, kindness and affection… the days when I believed I needed to be gorgeous, have lots of money and be a rock star to get her.
I used to have a major problem with focusing on every little negative detail about myself and working like hell to find a way to make sure a woman wouldn’t notice it.
What do you think it screams to a woman when you act this way on any level?
It screams out to her loud and clear that you have self-esteem issues – the greater your concern, the greater the issue.
These are the kind of things women told me they wanted in a man so I should listen straight from the horse’s mouth right? Ohh how wrong I was. For all the favors, kiss-ups, giveaways and everything else to try to please these woman I went years without one so much as talking to me in a sexually interested way.
I WAS TRYING TO APPROACH ATTRACTION USING MALE LOGIC.
However once I got to high school and began to mature and begin to look at the world in a new light I began to realize things:
Women weren’t paying any attention to me and no matter how much I unconsciously believed that they were going to. For the first time in my life I truly realized that I was the problem and not them.
Girls would use me for favors, homework answers, to find out if one of my guy friends liked them and a lot of other things I’m not going to detail here.
As I moved toward my junior year and watched girls going in and out of relationships I began to have even more startling revelations:
A guy would cheat on his girlfriend several times and they would be together for three more years; whenever they did break up it was, more often than not, the girlfriend who came running back.