So, here we are at the ever so crucial phone call. We’ve done a good job building plenty of interest in our emails and we have her number. So, now it’s time to give her a call.

Now, once again, do not wait too long to call her. Remember, we want to get her on the phone as soon as possible. The best time to call her is the day after she gives you her number.

There are certain times of the day that are best for calling her. These include evenings during the week, say after 7PM. Weekends are also good, usually Sunday evenings. Avoid calling her on Friday or Saturday nights. She’s likely to be out with friends at those times.

Now, the whole point of your first phone conversation is to build a little more comfort then set up a meeting or date. That means it’s best to keep the first phone convo short. Say no longer then fifteen minutes. Now, if things are going well and the vibe with her is great, then go longer. There is nothing wrong with that.

calling girls

OK, so now give her a call. If she doesn’t answer leave a message. Most women do not answer the first time you call. They might be busy or they just want to call you back later. So, think of a good message you can leave on her voicemail and have it thought out in advance.

I like the simple and direct method. I don’t like to leave “goofy” messages on a woman’s machine. This is, however up to you. If that’s your style then go ahead and leave a funny message.

This is an example of a message I might leave her:

“Hi, (name). It’s Chris from Match. It’s about 830 on Tuesday, just want to touch base and say HI. Give me a call…. OK, bye.”

That’s it! Nothing fancy just short and simple. You just need to let her know that you called.

I also like that example because it conveys confidence and shows that I’m busy.

Now, nine times out of ten she’ll call you back an hour or so later, or even the next day. So, what do you do if she doesn’t call you back? Hey, it happens. No big deal. No reason to get all excited and angry.

Just wait a few days and call her again. If she doesn’t answer leave her a message saying you called her a few days back and you just want to touch base. Same tone, make it simple and direct.

If she still doesn’t call you back, MOVE ON! DO NOT CALL HER A THIRD TIME. This is important. A confident, desirable guy doesn’t have time to keep calling a woman over and over again. Resist the urge and do not call her more than two times.

There could be a million reasons why she’s not calling you back. She found someone else, a death in the family, you just don’t know for sure. DO NOT DWELL ON IT! Just move on!

OK, so once you do get her on the line, what do you talk about? Well, this is completely up to you. The best thing to do is to continue the banter you had going from previous emails. This could be anything.

Maybe you two talked about traveling in Europe. Well continue that. Maybe you talked about American Idol. Continue that conversation. It’s best to have a flow to the dialogue. Start funny, joke about finally confirming she’s a real person. Something like that. If you start off getting her laughing, you’re gold!

Now, just continue the vibe for a bit and then it will be time to set up a meeting. It’s very important you take the lead and suggest setting up a meet. Tell her something like:

“Hey, listen what’s your schedule like the next few days?”

She’ll tell you when she’s available. Then, pick a day and time and tell her where to meet up. Always pick the venue!! If she doesn’t like the idea you came up with, she’ll tell you. Work with her and agree on a place. Make it simple!

Don’t play games and act like you’re busy for the next two weeks. Again, that’s immature and you’ll be shooting yourself in the foot. I’ve tried to do that before and most times I ended up not meeting her at all.

So agree on a time, day and venue and do it as soon as possible. You want to get her in person so you can find out if she’s someone you want to date. Remember, you never really know for sure until you meet face to face.

OK, here is your phone conversation template:

(Start off humorous. Try and get her laughing right off the bat. Continue banter from previous emails. After about ten to fifteen minutes say, “Hey, listen, what’s your schedule like the next few days?” Agree on a day and time. Suggest a venue. Once agreed, end the phone call.)

There you go, if you follow that template you can’t fail. No more struggling on the phone!