Because attraction is emotional, before we can even begin to build attraction, we first have to establish emotional fluidity with the woman we are attracted to. So that means in social comfort, as soon as we start talking we are trying to get emotional reactions.

This is the flip side of the non-reactive coin, we are trying to not give emotional reactions, we are trying to not show that we are being swayed, or that they’re having any emotional effect on us, while at the same time, getting the woman to laugh, feel sad, feel frustrated, feel happy, feel excited, feel intrigued, all of these emotions. Emotional fluidity is simply the ability to influence a woman’s emotions.

The key understanding here is that the opposite of love is not hate, but apathy. When a person is just not interested in you, that’s the worst reaction you can get.

It can happen in two to three minutes. You can be on top of the world one minute and at the bottom the next. Our emotions are very fluid, they are very transient. Emotions do not last forever, which is why attraction by itself is not enough, because attraction by itself, as great as it is, is just an emotion, and there are many emotions that a woman can feel.

A woman is not going to feel an attraction for you for the lifespan of your
relationship. She’s got 87,000 different emotions, but being able to affect that woman emotionally, is the core skill of attraction in my opinion, because you have to get them emotionally stimulated. You have to be able to get her
emotionally reacting.

Remember how the person who emotionally reacts has less social power? We want her to be emotionally reacting so that we have more social power, so we can do more things, so we can make things happen.

A good way to build emotional fluidity is by breaking rapport, breaking that social comfort, teasing, humor, role plays (which we are going to talk about very soon), is another way to build emotional fluidity, as is talking about emotional language. Most men do not speak emotionally enough, they talk very logically. They talk in facts and figures and specifics, as opposed to emotions. You want to talk about “What did you feel? Were you excited? Were you scared? Was it happy, was it sad, was it nervous, was it weird?”

The more emotions you put into your language, the better you’re going to do with women because emotions are how they process the world.